Are these puppets large enough for adults to use as well behind a back drop would they be a to small?

Yes this puppet is for Adults and can be controlled from backstage.

Do all the puppets come with a arm rod or do i have to buy one seperatly

Arm rod comes with 25 and 30 inches puppet. For 14 inches you need to buy it separately.

Do you control the puppet from the backside

Yes, the puppet is controlled from backside.